First of all,
I would like to clear up a misconception about introverts. While it’s true that
being around people for a long time is draining to us and small talk is tedious
if not impossible, we don’t dislike people in general. Most of us can function quite well in groups,
we have friends we enjoy hanging out with, and we can get on stage and perform
with as much confidence as anyone else.
The difference comes in the fact that we need more time alone to
recharge than our extroverted counterparts.
So for all
my introverted sisters and brothers, here are some tips to help you get the
most out of your ATS® Homecoming experience without burning-out in the process.
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| Terri, ATS® Homecoming Producer found time to watch the sunrise and get centered every morning. |
Tip 1: Give
yourself a break.
I mean this
both literally and figuratively. When
you feel like you are running on fumes, do not be afraid to take the time you
need to recharge and reset. This may mean skipping a workshop or other planned
event. This can be hard to do when you have paid for an entire weekend package
and you feel guilty not attending something for which you have already paid.
Then there is the fact that you signed up for the workshops for a reason and
that your friends are all going and you don’t want to miss out. These feelings
of guilt and exclusion can cause you to keep going when you shouldn’t. I can promise you, you will get much more out
of the experience by taking care of yourself and not overloading than you would
by forcing yourself to “just deal with it”.
Self-care is always important and you should not feel guilty for meeting
your needs. As one of my sources for
this article said; “Don't pressure yourself to do All The Things… Don't beat
yourself up for bowing out of a dinner, class, or other event. Better to really enjoy fewer things than to
implode from doing All The Things.”
Tip 2: Find a Sanctuary.
For
introverts, the noise and the crowds can be overwhelming. If you are lucky
enough to be able to afford your own hotel room, then you already have that sanctuary
set aside for you. However, for those of us who are scrimping and saving just
to cover the travel and the workshops, you can bet your sweet bippy we are
packing as many people as we can into that hotel room to save some cash. What this means is that we need to find
another place we can go or retreat to in order to have our time to
recharge. Last year, I found a time of
day that the hot tub was all but empty.
I was able to take an hour, while everyone else was busy, and enjoy the
hot water on my aching back and the quiet.
If you are unable to find a quiet place, then headphones and a less
crowded corner can be your best friends. Find a corner or chair (outside of the
workshops) and put on your favorite music or audio book, close your eyes, and
usually, people are respectful enough to leave you to it for as long as you
need to. Sometimes even a 10-15 minute reprieve can be enough.
Tip3: Have a Plan
Sometimes
the stress can culminate from being in a large group and not being sure what to
do. You can stave off some of this by
giving yourself a job to do. This
doesn’t mean that you have to be a volunteer or on the event staff (although if
you are, you already know what your job is), but you can plan out what it is
that you want to accomplish for your scheduled time. For example, for one workshop your job could
be to stand off to the side and take really thorough notes. For another
workshop your job could be to stand in the front and really focus on committing
the new moves to muscle memory, etc.
Have a plan before you walk into the room and then the sheer number of
people in the room with you won’t seem so daunting.
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| Participants taking notes at ATS® Homecoming 2015 |
Tip 4:
Talking the Talk
Introverts
tend to be really bad at small talk. It
doesn’t mean that we don’t want to talk to you or that we don’t care or we
aren’t interested in meeting you. It’s just that the thought of standing there
and talking about innate things, like the weather, general statements about the
number of people, or how awesome the weekend is, give us the heebie jeebies and
makes us want to run. So as an introvert
in a room full of other ATS® dancers that we really do want to meet and network
with; how on earth do you initiate a conversation without feeling like a total
dolt? And, what on earth do you say when someone approaches you?
This is
something I struggle with, as not only am I introverted, but I am socially
awkward as well. For me, I am lucky
enough to attend these events with my troupe and most of them don’t have an
issue with this. Therefore, I tend to grab one as my wingman and allow my extroverted
friend take the conversation lead while I nod and try to participate when I
feel I have something of value to add. The downfall to this approach is that
while you were there, the people you met and talked to are more likely to
remember your friend than you. However, repeated encounters like this are how I
have met most of the dancers I now know and network with. If you are sans
wingman, and find yourself in a conversation and at a loss for words, ask them
questions about themselves. People are usually more than willing to take the
conversation and talk about themselves, and by turning the conversation to be
about them, you are taking some of the pressure off of you. Also, try to talk
to one person at a time and lead with questions that will initiate a meaningful
conversation and hopefully avoid the discussions about the weather.
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| A lovely path on the bay is right next to the conference hotel. It is perfect for a little alone time. |
Tip 5:
Balance is paramount.
We are
talking about 3-4 days of crowds of people, noise, shopping, and chaos for an
event such as this. The key here is to
pace yourself. If you go full-out for the first two days, by the end of the
event you are going to be one burnt-out, grumpy, (insert your own adjective
here), dancer, and that won’t be fun for you or anyone else. Try scheduling
your social time keeping it to certain hours and don’t forget to schedule your
alone time as well. Achieve the goals you had for the event such as meeting
some new dancers, or focusing on your transitions, etc., but don’t forget to enjoy
the beauty that is San Francisco, just stand back and watch the magic of the
dancers all moving together in the love and appreciation of this dance. Don’t
forget to stay hydrated, get some sleep, and eat healthy food. And take the
other 4 tips from this article and space them out throughout the entire event,
so that you are as joyful on the last day as you were on the first.
I hope that
you have found something to take away from this article that can help you and I
wish you a pleasant and less stressful ATS® Homecoming. I need to take a moment
to thank the dancers who agreed to help me by being interviewed for this
article as I certainly don’t think that I have all the answers. A BIG Thank You
to Melissa Decker - Kalamazoo MI, Janet Taylor – FCBD® Teacher, and a few
others who wished to remain anonymous. I also need to send a big thank you and
apology to Lisa Chaves – Alabama. While we tried to connect for this article
life got in the way and we just couldn’t make it happen. I look forward to
meeting you in person and continuing this conversation.
-Dawn Grey,
Des Moines, IA – Director of Seize the Sway, Des Moines, IA and Member of
Darshana Tribal – Midwestern Multi-State Troupe.
